The reason I chose to
add this story was because I really feel it reflects my journey through the
darkness of addiction and into the light of a sober life. Before finding
Shay Louise House, I had been involved with two other rehabilitation programs
and because of the lack of accurate and detailed information provided, I managed
to convince myself that I could do better, that I knew better than these
programs. The problem with this is that you don’t know about the traps,
the stinking thinking, the dry drunk/drug, the three month hurdles. Trying
to quit on your own without a structured program is like trying to paddle a boat
with one oar, you go around and around and eventually end up where you started.
On a very miserable
day six months ago, I drove myself to Shay Louise House, and signed myself up
for their DrugBeat Programme; the best decision I have
ever made.
It’s tough nobody
will ever tell you otherwise, but something that’s helped me and I have
witnessed helping others, is information, information which leads you to
understanding what’s happening on all levels; emotional, mental, and physical.
That most vital bit of information that I was given was that drugs stop you
feeling on an emotional level, and that the first three months I was going to be
feeling emotions that I hadn’t felt for years. This was not easy, when
these emotions come back boy do they come back with a vengeance, but with the
help of the beautiful staff here at Shay Louise House I was able to understand
and be comfortable with these feelings and not look to avoid and suppress them.
I am now six months clean and I won’t bullshit and tell you how sweet life is
now, but life has improved out of sight and most importantly I can see a light
at the end of the tunnel. I never thought I would actually say this but
I’m actually looking forward to my next six months of rehab, and even better
yet, I’m looking forward to living a life of sobriety.
I have been a drug
user for 22 years and with everything I have done and seen one thing I know is
that no one comes off drugs by replacing them with clinical drugs, that is only
a lie that drug users tell themselves so they don’t have to do a reality check
on themselves and admit that they need to deal with why their on drugs in the
first place.
Shay Louise House is
the only safe and down to earth place who’s whole purpose is to help us find out
why we do what we do and also find out who we really are, so that we in the end
really live a life full of purpose and meaning and understanding of ourselves
and others. Thank God for Shay Louise House.
If anyone out there
really wants to come off drugs, all drugs including alcohol and prescription
drugs, then come to Shay Louise House and I swear that if you give them 15
months of your life, they will give you the tools and confidence to live the
rest of your life with absolute freedom to be whoever you really are, it’s hard
work but very, very worth it.
The five chapters
of life
Chapter 1:
I walk down the
street.
There is a deep hole
in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I’m lost.
I’m helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to
find my way out.
Chapter 2:
I walk down the same
street.
There is a deep hole
in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see
it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I’m
in the same place.
But it isn’t my
fault.
It still takes a long
time to get out.
Chapter 3:
I walk down the same
street.
There is a deep hole
in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in.
It’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It*is* my fault.
I get out
immediately.
Chapter 4:
I walk down the same
street.
There is a deep hole
in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
Chapter 5:
I walk down another
street.
By Portia Nelson
